[ dan knows his place. he's low on the totem pole of Ophiuchus. but that's not where his trajectory is aimed. as annoyed as he sounds, he knows being in klaus' good graces could lead to something worthwhile and rewarding. he acts like a blair. and without knowing it, he has dan's respect. he just needs to parlay that into recognition outside of his hut. ]

Or, it could be you dropping in unannounced to learn what I know about Stefan Salvatore. And company. [ he likes to at least be on both solid and equal ground, so he pulls himself to his feet. ] Let's see. Stefan has a horse. He let me borrow his insanely expensive copy of Wuthering Heights. First Edition, Emily Bronte's pen name expensive. We discovered what the aloe does and while I could go into detail, neither of us want that and ... Annie showed me where the showers are. There are showers and the plumbing started working again. Group showers, high school locker room style. But, beggars, you know? Um. I think I'm friends with Rebekah now thanks to Stefan's awkward first day advances, which, to this day I can't actually remember in detail. And I can't bring myself to sleep with anyone because I think I've regressed and need to get to know them before anything happens. Them being women, I'm still straight. [ he raises his eyebrows. ] And that's all the news that's fit to print. Maybe. Who knows what you actually want to know.